Blog From A Broad

monkey!



Since I am never one to turn down the chance to a) talk about myself and b) copy what others are doing, here's my contribution to Ed's 12 Monkeys Non-Meme. Here's how you play: write a list of all the jobs you've held and post them to your site. Now how easy is that? Very.



Jobs held (not including babysitting or working at a summer camp) since 1985:

• Various restaurant jobs: From fast food joints to tea rooms (run by the maddest Scottish woman on the planet who used to shout out "MOOF!" whenever she wanted you to get out of the way, and used to call us "smucken fart alecks"), I served unhealthy food to the public. No, you can't sue me for being fat - now shoo.
  
  
• Telesales: I was one of those horrible telesales people for the Globe and Mail newspaper. I did it for one evening and promptly quit.
  
  
• Various gas station/petrol station jobs: Esso, Shell, and Sunoco to be precise. I absolutely loved working in gas stations because I could just sit in my kiosk and chat with friends, eating chips and chocolate bars. Grand. The graveyard shift was such a blast.
  
  
• Various video shop jobs: One in Toronto and one in Montreal. At the Montreal one, I got held up at gunpoint one week after the massacre at the Ecole Polytechnique. I wasn't hurt, but I did lose faith in humanity that day.
  
  
• My one any only job as a waitress: I am the world's worst waitress because I have a bad combination of being clumsy and having a crap short term memory. I worked for one school year at the Kosher restaurant at York University. I spilled a plate of hot fries on a blind man. I dropped an entire tray of ketchup bottles, making the restaurant look like a scene from The Godfather. Oddly, I got good tips.
  
  
• Various bookstore jobs: Although I worked for some genuine nutcases, I loved working with books. I still have a book fetish and was gutted when I had to sell most of my books before I moved here. Gutted.
  
  
• Volunteer/I Get No Cash for This But I Love It work: I've been a dance teacher (assistant to my dance teacher, actually), editor and graphic designer (for two literary journals), and book review writer (for a Japanese Canadian monthly newsletter).
  
  
• Receptionist: Being the only person in the office who knew how to work a computer, I was a receptionist/IT support specialist who trained everyone how to use Microsoft Office. I also pasted together fabric samples (it was in the garment district) and I think my voice is still on some people's voicemail boxes. This was 7 years ago.
  
  
• Technical writer: My career and what I've been doing for the past 6 years. I like it. I think I'll stay.