Friday 27 April 2007


I'm feeling so lazy lately, and as everyone I know reads this blog, I figured it would save a lot of effort if I answer some frequently asked questions here. I also have a grocery list ready to go if anyone fancies going to the supermarket for me. No? Just thought I'd ask. Anyhoo.

  • The bum is better, thanks. Still can't sit properly, though.
  • 33 weeks on Saturday.
  • Yes, you can buy pink things for the baby.
  • Seriously, you can. Stop asking.
  • I thought I was going to just use red gingham and/or polka dots in the nursery, but now I'm really favouring the vintage rose look.
  • No, our bedroom's not done yet.
  • Jack doesn't really understand the concept of a forthcoming sibling. I think he'd prefer it if Bob the Builder, Fireman Sam, or Thomas the Tank Engine moved in with us.
  • Home water birth with an independent midwife. I'm hoping that my dog will keep me relaxed and pain-free.
  • Yes, we have a name. No, I won't tell you what it is - but we'd love to hear your guesses.

Yawn...time to start maternity leave. Wake me when I go into labour.

lady of leisure

I completely forgot to write about the wonderfully fantastic spa day I had recently. My brilliant husband (he just ran a marathon, you know) gave me the gift of a super duper extra luxurious with bells on spa day for Christmas, and I finally redeemed the voucher a couple of weeks ago. If I could purr, that's the only noise I would have made the entire day. But then again if I could purr, that would make me allergic to myself and that could get annoying pretty quickly.

Anyway. Spa day. It was at a posh gym in Cambridge, which meant that I got some rather strange looks as I waddled around on a tour of the facilities. People probably wondered how I was possibly going to sit on an exercise bike or get back out of the rowing machine. My day started with a long swim (and by "swim" I mean a gentle paddle back and forth a few times for show, not getting my face wet because I'm wearing contacts) and a long soak in a spa. I was beyond thrilled to discover that they had a "cool spa" (pregnant women shouldn't use hot spas) that was the same temperature as the pool. I sat in bubbly goodness for ages and ages, and shut my eyes. Mmm yes. The changing room was lovely, complete with a clever little machine that spins your swimsuit around until it's almost dry, so that you don't have to shove a wet suit in your bag afterwards. I then had some lunch and some time to spare, allowing me a brief journey to the local retail estate and a peek at the new Habitat.

When I returned, I was shown to my pampering room and for the first time in ages, was able to lie on my belly as they had a special pregnancy massage table with a cut out bit for my bump. They really need to create a table with a cut out bit for pregnancy boobs, but I'm not that fussy. I had an hour long massage, followed by some sort of exfoliating treatment (my arms are still baby bottom soft). Then I had my very first facial, and I have no clue what was done to me. Things were rubbed into my skin, wiped off, layered on top and left to dry, wiped off again, while the beautician gently massaged my face with little butterfly movements. The finale involved a manicure and a pedicure, the latter being a huge treat when one can no longer reach one's toes. Or see them...apparently they do look nice.

Scrumptious. Want one every week, please.

So in a similar vein, I am about to enjoy the luxury of being a lady of leisure when my maternity leave starts at the end of the day. It's always a bit strange going on leave, because it's not often you leave a job and return to it at a later point. This means I've got to actually do a decent job and wrap everything up nicely, and I can't march around the office telling everyone precisely what I think of them. How boring.

I will enjoy this time while I can, before the chaos of life with toddler and newborn commences. I might not get out of my pyjamas for a week. I might not wear makeup for a month. I might spent my afternoons with my mummy friends and eat cake. I might watch the seven episodes of "Desperate Housewives" I've got recorded on Sky+.

I might blog more. Gosh.

Tuesday 24 April 2007

run run as fast as you can

Paul did amazingly, brilliantly well on Sunday, despite the heat. People were mad enough to run in costumes (Bakewell tarts, ScoobyDoo, Fred Flintstone in a car, several Elvises/Elvii, Borat, Bubbles Devere and her arch rival Desiree, Darth Vader, Chewbacca, and a Vegas showgirl, to name a few) and even the pros completed the run at a slower time than usual. The weather was great for spectators, not so great when you need to run 26 miles with 37,000 people.

Paul completed the marathon relatively unscathed (with some impressive blisters, mind) and made us all incredibly proud. I got tired just watching, and had an extra sausage that evening to compensate for all those calories I must have lost. What?

i'm still not glowing

For those of you who are squeamish or feel that there are some things you'd really rather not know about my body, turn away now. I have just been diagnosed with something called a perianal haematoma, an incredibly painful condition due to the weight of my bump that will apparently cure itself after the birth. Grand - only two months to go, then. I'm usually pretty good at dealing with pain, but this has reduced me to hysterics and crying fits over the past few days.

I ended up at the hospital on Saturday to see an out of hours doctor (who enlightened me about this delightful injury), spent the weekend confined to a sofa (I cannot thank my in-laws enough for doing everything to make sure I could rest), and spent this morning between my GP and a surgical consult team at the hospital. That's right, a whole damn team of people looked at my arse this morning; I cannot tell you how thrilled I was about that. A surgeon, OB, nurse, and assorted med students were present at my examination, while my husband (who will never look at my butt the same way again) kept me company. The verdict? It's massive (said by two different doctors with both sympathy and awe), nothing can be done, but here, have some soothing anesthetic gel so that you can keep your sanity. Apparently you can get surgery to alleviate the pressure, but that can also induce labour. So you know, I think I'll pass on that option.

The gel has helped thankfully, but there's nothing else I can do but apply ice packs and stay on my side. It should shrink with time, but won't go away completely until the baby is born. It's my last week at work but I will likely dial in from home because sitting just isn't in my repertoire at the moment. Jack's been saying things like "Mummy's crying" and "Mummy's bum sore" lately. Cute but not really the sort of thing you want him to repeat at nursery.

So no, not really glowing right now.

Friday 20 April 2007

demand and supply

Photos of Jack from this year (so far) can be seen here.

If I'm this bad at uploading pics of Jack, how dire is it going to be when we've got two kids? I apologise to my offspring in advance.

running man

I'm so proud of Paul. He has, rain or shine, trained every single week with a dedication and determination that inspires me. Our little boy knows when "Daddy's running" and then tears around the house yelling "I running, too!" Paul's raised just over £2,000 (not including the amount that will be matched by our company), which I know from experience is a great accomplishment. On Sunday, Paul will be one of 40,000 people running through London and we will be there to cheer him on. I honestly could never have done this myself (obviously not these days, anyway.)

You can still sponsor him here, and/or leave messages of encouragement in the comments. He's doing something pretty amazing - but then again, he's a pretty amazing guy.

We love you, marathoner! xx

Wednesday 18 April 2007

let me entertain you

Scene: 6.30am, bedroom.

A toddler is standing quietly at the end of a bed, containing two sleeping parents.

Toddler: "Winkle, Howa Uppa bubba worl...ayyy. Winkle," (claps) "YAY!"
"Pull, pull. Tap, tap, tap."*
"Buh buh back seep, wool. Yessa yessa."
"Row row row row row row row."

Parents remain under the covers with eyes closed, shaking the bed with uncontrollable giggling.

*(From the song "Wind the Bobbin Up", a tune unfamiliar to my Canadian ears until recently)

Thursday 12 April 2007

someone likes us!

The lovely Suburban Mum lady has nominated this blog for a Blogger's Choice Award (Best Parenting Blog). I've never been nominated for anything before, except when people assign horrible tasks to me at work meetings I've missed.

If you'd like to vote for me, please do so here. Suburban Mum is also up for the same award, so go on and vote for her too.

I am feelin' the love.

Wednesday 11 April 2007

glowing, my arse

I have been such a ball of fun lately. I truly feel like I've had only a handful of days where I felt physically fine. There's always something - aches and pains, heartburn, nausea, piles, headaches, chronic colds/allergies, sleeplessness, fatigue, lizard skin, constipation one minute and diarrhoea the next, wind, and Dropitis (the condition in which you cannot pick anything up without dropping it). I have no short term memory and I always want to fall asleep immediately after eating supper. I can't move without making weird noises. I can't sit at my desk for very long because it makes my bum numb. I can't stand for more than a few minutes at a time. I haven't shaved my legs since September.

To top it all, I've now got an irrational fear of going into labour early. There's no good reason for it as I have no preexisting medical condition or history that makes me at risk, it's just another worry. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that our bedroom and ensuite are still under construction and if the baby came now, she'd have to sleep in a drawer.

This is my last pregnancy and I should be cherishing every moment. Maybe it'll all get better when I go on maternity leave at the end of this month. Feh.

Friday 6 April 2007

yes, i know how insane this sounds

The clothes arrived and ohmygawd the socks! They're so tiny! I could eat them! And the green dress came with matching knickers!! Eeeeeeeeeeeee!!!


Thursday 5 April 2007

every baby should get one

For those of you who follow American Idol*, Cafe Press are now selling these:

I'm wondering if they make these in adult sizes.

*(please don't tell me anything about this week's results show - it doesn't air here until Friday nights!)

why the internet and a credit card can be a bad thing

I couldn't resist. I had to buy Beanie some clothes because I hadn't done so yet (and what's a girl without a cute wardrobe?), so I clicked on the Next site and bought some essentials:

and some not so essentials:

Did I mention that I bought this baby bag yesterday:

mostly because it goes nicely with my Hooter Hider?

That's right - I'm spending while I still have an income. Woohooooooo.

Wednesday 4 April 2007


It would have been my due date today, had Squeak made it past 8 weeks. I know that I was amazingly lucky to fall pregnant again so soon and to be carrying a healthy baby, but I still think about my miscarriage every day and it breaks my heart. As I mentioned before, I want to decorate Beanie's room with red gingham and red/white polka dots, and I came across this little toy in a magazine recently from Lapin and Me:

This just seemed perfect. It'll be like Squeak is watching over this one, which is something I've felt since day one of this pregnancy. When I found out I was pregnant with Beanie, I looked out the window and saw a double rainbow. I lifted Jack up so he could see and looked up at the sky and said "Thank you."

I will never, ever stop missing you, my little mouse.

Tuesday 3 April 2007

what a swell birthday it's been

On Friday, my husband and I took the day off work and I was treated to a delicious lunch at a pub called The Plough. It's run by the couple who were in charge at the Old Bridge when we got married, and the food was fantastic. I had a light and velvety leek and potato soup to start, salmon fishcakes, and a perfectly cooked creme brulee for dessert. Paul had smoked salmon and blinis, steak and kidney pudding, and a selection of English cheese. Yum, yum, and yum.

On Saturday, I woke up to a pile of presents and a little boy who was more than willing to help me open them. After establishing that everything wasn't indeed "MINE!" (particularly the TomTom device), he decided to walk around with a gift bag on his head making various arrrrrrrrgh type noises. As you do. Jack has been singing a happy birthday song to me for the past few days (it goes: "Happy birthday...youuuuu" over and over until he's distracted by something), and it makes my heart melt. Paul made me a dinner of filet steak with my favourite horrifyingly calorific creamy potatoes, which I inhaled in around three seconds. Yum again, I say.

I don't really mind being a year older; any excuse to eat cake is fine by me. It was a lovely weekend, I was spoiled rotten, and I even managed to have a long nap on one afternoon. I could do this every year.

Monday 2 April 2007

why you shouldn't buy expensive toys

Jack in the Box (AKA It's Amazing What you can Buy at Kiddicare These Days)