Blog From A Broad

my brain is still in bed

We managed to fit all of our purchases, luggage, dog, and dog-related items into the car and made our way home yesterday afternoon. My plants are still alive, but looking a bit morose. I'm jetlagged and sunburned (but only on my back and shoulders for some reason) and very glad to be home.



Even though it felt very familiar, there were many signs that we were definitely not in Canada. We saw a woman with a small dog in her handbag shopping in a mall. We saw too many overtanned middle aged women with bleached blonde hair and permanently surprised expressions. We saw several gun shops (and is it really a good idea to have a gun AND pawn shop? Doesn't that just tempt people to rob you of your pawned jewellery after purchasing a gun?). There was an ad for "stuffed French toast" from a chain restaurant, which looked like deep fried bread with whipped cream in the middle, covered in more whipped cream and powdered sugar. Every menu had a special low carb option, light beer is advertising itself as being low carb (it used to be low calorie), and stores were filled with low carb foods (I find it amusing that the low carb chocolates and candies contain exactly the same amount of fat and calories as their sugar-laden counterparts). Apparently, it's customary to tip 20% at restaurants. No wonder Americans think that Brits and Canadians are bad tippers.



Even though it wasn't a holiday, it was nice to be somewhere warm and dip my toes in the sea. And just like being on holiday, I'm now too fat to fit into anything that isn't completely elasticized.