Monday, March 29, 2004
no wonder paul looks a bit frightened these days
It's getting bad. I'm now at the point where I say things like, "Look! Even fictitious lesbians are having babies!!" when watching ER. Yesterday, we discovered hundreds of frog spawn in our pond which for most people would be a poignant sign of Spring. I shouted out, "Look! Even the frogs are having babies!!" When Paul asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I said "A baby - I'll be ovulating around that time, so you could literally give me a baby for my birthday!"
Help.
Wednesday, March 24, 2004
and she didn't even barf on me
Had a visit last night with the fabulous Jack and Heather and their newest addition, Rebecca. She is absolutely beautiful and yes, I'm probably quite biased. I think the conversation in the car on the way home went something like: "Baby. Now. Want one. Now." whilst tapping my watch repeatedly. I really don't want my friends to get the impression that I'm some crazed broody lunatic who's only interested in their babies because I'm so keen to have one myself. No really, I'm not. I just get such a kick out of seeing the mini versions of my friends. It's one thing to look at pictures of someone's baby (particularly someone you don't know well) and think that s/he is very cute. It's another thing entirely to hold a little person who was created by two of your good friends.
As an only child and unmarried, I've never been an Auntie Lisa. I am thrilled to be a pseudo-Auntie to my friend's babies, even if this means there will be several British children wondering why they have an Auntie with a funny accent. Paul's 8-year-old niece Grace sometimes refers to me as "Auntie Lisa, not just yet". How lucky am I to be surrounded by these great kids?
Still tapping my watch repeatedly, though.
Tuesday, March 09, 2004
...aaaaaand relax
I came across a large chart in a book the other night, explaining all the various symptoms of pregnancy along with alternative explanations for these symptoms (i.e. if you're not actually pregnant). I found it rather amusing (maybe that's not really the right word for it) that almost all symptoms could also be attributed to stress. For example:
Symptom: Menstruation ceases
Causes: Pregnancy, increase in physical activity, stress
Symptom: Nausea
Causes: Pregnancy, illness, stress
Symptom: Headaches
Causes: Pregnancy, vision problems, stress
So for those of us who've spent a good deal of time feeling stressed, pregnancy should be a breeze, right?
Sunday, March 07, 2004
the waiting
Heather and Lisa are due anytime now, and I think it's safe to say that both of them are eager to get this show on the road, so to speak. I'm so excited for both of them, and I am so looking forward to seeing pictures (Lisa) and our first visit (Heather). Gary and Ruth are coming over with baby Naomi today, and I can't wait to hold her. Is it strange to have such emotions for a baby that's not even yours? Or related to you? Hormones. I blame hormones.
I was reading another one of my pregnancy books last night, and felt especially moved by the sections that described the various stages of fetal development. I felt myself smiling at the bits about baby hiccups and how babies have "nap times" even before birth. I really want to get pregnant now. Really. Now.
Hormones. I blame hormones.
Tuesday, March 02, 2004
worrywart
I don't know if I'm a worrier by nature, but I do know that I think too much. In my younger years, I tended to dive into most anything head first without a second thought (I still do this sometimes) but now I plan. Whether or not I actually stick to those plans is another matter entirely, but I do plan. I don't like to be surprised unless it involves an enormous diamond ring, winning lottery numbers, or George Clooney popping out of a birthday cake. It's probably strange to make plans for babies we haven't even conceived yet, but it makes me feel better; more prepared somehow. On the downside, it also means that I am starting to fret about things that are a long way off yet.
I am still in a quandary about the whole working/not working/working part time thing. All I can do is save up for any maternity leave now and just see how I feel when the time comes.
I'm on day 18 of my cycle and there's been no temperature shift yet. I promised myself that I wouldn't turn into a maniac about charting (I've seen enough obsessed people's messages on various pregnancy web boards to deter me), but it is a bit disheartening. I have a fear that years of being on the pill, my current age, and my wonky cycles as a teen/young adult means that ovulation is unpredictable. Or nonexistent.
I'm going to be 35 at the end of this month. I didn't really care about that until I realised that by the time we're ready for baby #2, it might be too late. I'm not even sure how long it'll be before we start trying for baby #1. And then how long it'll be before baby #1 is born after x months of trying. Gaaaaaaahhhh! *tick tick tick tick tick tick tick*
Otherwise, I'm peachy thanks.